October 16, 2012

• A TON OF NON SEQUITURS

  Last night I was watching "Love It or List It" on HGTV.  The realtor was pushing the virtues of a house he wanted a couple to buy, and said, "It has tons of storage space."  I've heard that many times from realtors and it always makes me wonder what, precisely, is a ton of storage space?  Does it mean the space will hold a ton of lead or perhaps a ton of feathers?  Later on in the show he mentioned that a room has "tons of light."  That puzzles me even more.  How much light constitutes a ton?  I know air weighs something, but does light?  Then I turned to "Pawn Stars" and the pawn shop owner, in talking about an item brought in, said, "There are a ton of collectors who would be interested in this."  (Yeah, I know - he should have said "there IS" but please stay focused here.)  So then I started wondering how many collectors in a ton.  It could be ten 200-pounders or twenty 100-pounders.  Or it could be a mixed bag of collectors adding up to a ton.

  Then, as the daughter/wife/mother/grandmother of engineers, I had to wonder if that ton refers to a long ton, a short ton, or a metric ton.

  Ah, the curse of having a literal mind!

  • 1:22 pm
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